That Horribly Disgusting Thing Called Love!
by HugglesXKitten
Summary: It's Valentines Day! Zim gets a bump to the head and temporarily falls in love with... DUH DUH DUH! Read to find out... -suspended
1. And so it begins

THIS is My AwEsOmE nEw StOrY!

"Another burnt rubber piggy!" Dib complained. "For an alien Zim sure is boring." He had just finnished digging through Zim's garbage and was walking home. He sighed. "No, what am I _talking about_? He has green skin!" He slapped his forehead and walked into his house. "I'm home!"

"Not like anyone cares," Gaz said walking to her room. Dib sighed again. School time.

.

Zim was working on his most horrible plan ever. Unfortunately, a giant mutant chiuahuah was destroying his base.

"GAH! I demand you to stop! Fiend!" a rather torn and dishivelled looking Zim yelled. Then Gir ran in yelling.

"Master!"

"Can't you see I'm busy Gir? Go... moniter earth broadcasts or something..."

"But master! It's time for school... And ... it's Valentines Day!" Zim gasped and shoved the mutant chiuahuah into it's kennel. The chiuahuah yelped and licked it's paw.

" I must get my ingenious disguise!" Then Zim ran and changed into his pitiful earth-boy diguise. "I must study this holiday. The one they base on that horribly disgusting thing called...LOVE!" He mused, "These _humans_ seem to fall under some sort of spell on this day. Being urkin ( spelled wrong ) I am immune to this sorcery! Febuary. 14. When I uncover the secret, I will rule this world sooner than without the stupid humans being dazed and stupid!" Then he left Gir, who was making waffles.


	2. Thinking out loud again

ThIs Is An ImPoRtAnT cHaPtEr!

"Ahhhhh!"

Dib ran past the neighbors dog, who trailed after him. He ran into the school and slammed the door in the dogs face.

"Phew!" He looked around. People walking together, holding hands and even... HUMMING! "What's wrong with everyone?" Then he looked up. There was a big heart ornament haning from the ceileng. He stared. "Valentines day! Of Course!"

Zim ran into the school at that maoment, colliding with Dib and bonking heads with him (and what a large head it is).

Zim fell to the floor, but Dib was standing unfazed.

"What are you planning Zim?" He asked.

"Wha-?" Was all Zim said, looking stupid. Dib paced.

"I know he's planning something! He must be... He always is! But what? What could he be up to?" Zim stood up.

"If you are done with your useless mutterings I will be-" then he stopped and stared at something. Dib looked at him.

"What?" Then he looked where Zim was looking. Gaz had just walked in the door.

"What?" Gaz said. Dib looked at Zim, who was still staring. Gaz glared and sprayed them both with her soda poop. They both screamed at the agony of the soda poop burning them.

"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!"

"You two are weird," Gaz said, rolling her eyes, then she walked away.


	3. Woah! Reeeal Valentines!

OkAy… NoW iS tImE fOr A nEw ChApTeR… iS mY wRiTiNg LiKe ThIs AnNoYiNg YoU yEt?

Zim got up.

"Who is that disgusting creature?" Zim asked staring after Gaz. Dib gave him a weird look.

"That's my sister Gaz," he said carefully, "Why?"

"Gaz…" Zim murmured and started walking. Dib hurried after him.

"Why do you want to know my sister? Is she a part of your next evil plot? Are you going to stick a probe in her brain and--…"

"Silence!" Zim yelled, "A puny minded human pig-smelly such as yourself could never understand my genious!" And then he walked into class. Dib followed curiously.

"What is he up to?" he thought out loud. The whole class turned to him. He looked at them.

"Hey," said one student, "Dib's got dog doodie on his shoes!" The whole class (minus Zim, Dib, and the teacher) laughed.

"Now class… our school has re-adopted the origional Valentines Day tradition. Which means, you will not be passing out meat this year. You will instead pass out candy and such. Now go to it." The class groaned, Dib smiled, and Zim, well, Zim stared into oblivion.


	4. Short just to annoy you

JuSt To AnNoY yOu... THIS Is FrEaKiShLy ShOrT!

Zim sat.


	5. Dungeonified!

"I know Zim's up to something," Dib said to himself, pacing in the boy's washroom. It was a habit he had picked up a month ago, when he realized that he could be alone in there, seeing as no-one went in there on account of the creatures living in the toilets. He only went in there when the situation seemed like it could turn rotten at any moment. This was one of those times.

"What does he want with Gaz?" he pondered. "I usually would have at least had an idea of his idiotic plan, but not this time. Why? Why didn't he brag? Does he even have a plan, or is it just my imagination? And what was that look in his eye?" Dib turned, ignoring the questioning eyes staring at him from the toilet bowl, and left the bathroom.

As he joyrneyed down the inexplicably long hallway, he was showered in pink, heart-shaped confetti and valentines.

"Gah!" He exclaimed, " The emotions... Strangling... Can't breathe..." Then he passed out.

()()()()()()()()() ...>>> & &

When he awoke, Dib found himself in a small room.

"Wha- what's going on?"

"Oh. Not much. I could really use some food," uttered a rather large rat, eyeing him hungrily. Dib just stared at it.

"Little Billy, is that you?" The rat-thing blinked it's amazingly vacant eyes.

"Dib - I forgot your last name- is that you?" Dib wiped his forehead. It came back all sweaty.

"Yeah," he replied, " Where are we?" It was silent for a while. Just when he was about to give up hope, his friend spoke.

"Zim's dungeon." Dib sighed in relief. "In the boys change room."

"Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!"Dib screamed. Billy covered hismouth.A few seconds later he heard talking.

"Tell us what happened next Zim!" said the voice of a girl. More female voices agreed.

"Fine!" Zim always love to showoff. "Then I - ZIM IS ME!- knocked the Dib-monkey unconcious!" There were gasps and awed sounds. " It was quite simple really. He is quite stupid and did not even see my clever trap!"

"Oh Zim!" There wasa round of applause. Suddenly all stopped. All that could be heard was subtle footsteps. Then Din heard Zim gasp. When had Zim ever gasped?


	6. No Way!

SoRrY fOr ThE lOnG wAiT! i Do NoT hAvE iNtErNeT! mY bOyFrIeNds BeInG sUpEr CoOl AnD lEtTiNg Me UsE hIs!

By ThE wAy... CLIMAX!

"What are you looking at you green scuzzwad?" Gaz squinted at Zim. "And WHY are you in the girls washroom?"

Dib watched as Zim slowly but surely made his way closer to his sister. His giant alien eyes were sparkling in his green head.

"You beautiful creature," Zim said in his Zimmiest voice, "are the reason one such as I 'the incredible and AMAKING ZIM(!)' could be in such a vile and disgusting place such as this!"

Dib felt his stomach churn.

_'How disgusting_,' He thought silently.

Gaz's eye did that scrunchy thing it does and just stared at Zim in horrendously incredulous wonder. Then Dib witnessed something utterly impossible happen. A million sparkles burst forth from above Gaz's head and fell all around her, dissolving before they hit the ground. Gaz took one step towards Zim and smiled.

"How sweet of you to say that Zim. I'm sorry I called you a scuzzwad. I was just looking for you, actually. I wanted to-" She turned away momentarily, pulled out a giant pad of paper and scrawled across it in spidery handwriting. Then she turned back at held the paper out to Zim. "Ask you to be my Valentine."

GAZ GIVING A VALENTINE'S CARD!

Even more disturbing was what happened next. The two stepped together and met in a kiss.

Dib clutched his stomach and fell foreward onto the floor, writhing in agony as his gastric juices played havoc on his stomach.

Zim jumped back from Gaz with a shrill gasp.

"DIB! YOU AND YOUR GIANT HEAD HAVE SPIED ON ME ONE TOO MANY TIMES!"

Dib looked up at him, face still displaying his pain. Gaz peered over Zim's shoulder, looking so hideously, and disgustingly in love that Dib had to hold back his vomit.

"I say burn him, Zimmy-poo."

"AAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGG!"


End file.
